The Love List: Texts on Love, Intimacy, & Desire

 

By Samantha Oliver & Alexander Kelly

READ

The Course of Love, Alain de Botton

Read it: ...just read it. One of the best books written on love in the 21st Century.

Never Let Me Go, Kazuo Ishiguro

Read it: if you simultaneously want to believe in the power of love and lose all hope in everything

Normal People, Sally Rooney

Read it: if you’re looking for a quick page turner with high relatability (note: some mental health triggers)

So Bright and Delicate, Love Letters and Poems of John Keats to Fanny Brawne

Read it: because it’s one of our worlds most beloved love stories, recorded intimately and artfully;  inspired the film Bright Star

Sonnets from the Portuguese, Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Read it: then share with your lover, “How do I love thee? Let me count the ways…”

Perfume: The Story of a Murderer, Patrick Süskind

Read it: if you’re interested in the dark side of desire

Wuthering Heights, Emily Brontë

Read it: because it’s one of the most approachable classic’s on love and desire

The Year of Magical Thinking, Joan Didion

Read it: if you’re interested in a tender and honest account of loss and love. It will make you breathe deep, and weep.

The Time Traveller’s Wife, Audrey Niffenegger

Read it: a love story, plain and simple

The Four Loves, C. S. Lewis

Read it: to explore the nature of love as it exists within and around us

Metamorphoses, Ovid

Read it: as a foundational text on the transformative power of desire

Sonnet 18, William Shakespeare

Read it: because reciting “Shall I compare thee to a summers day?” could be one of the most romantic acts you’ll ever perform

The Art of Loving, Erich Fromm

Read it: for a case for love as a skill to be honed, by a modern master

Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence, Esther Perel

Read it: to explore love’s necessary paradoxes: closeness and distance, security and freedom, surrender and autonomy - a powerful manual for love



WATCH

Stealing Beauty

Watch it: Because young Liv Tyler, sexual discovery and Italy in the Summer

I Am Love

Call Me By Your Name 

A Bigger Splash 

Watch (them): As an incredible trilogy on desire by Luca Guadagnino ft. Tilda Swinton (everything), Ralph Fiennes, Timothy Chalamet, Armie Hammer

Beginners

Watch it: for an unconventional love story of the sweetest nature

Before Sunrise

Watch it: and then continue with the full trilogy in Before Sunset and Before Midnight

When Harry Met Sally

Watch it: a classic and a must-see

Master of None S2

Watch it: for the black and white Italian opening and Aziz Ansari’s dance scene alone 

Baz Luhrmann’s Romeo & Juliet

Watch it: Desire desire desire (+ Danes and DiCaprio)

Love (Netflix)

Watch it: as a great exploration of the relationship between love and addiction

Modern Love (Netflix)

Watch it: because it’s simply and surprisingly beautiful. Based on a New York Times column by the same name

Annie Hall

Watch it: Because it’s funny and witty and endearing and pleasant and honest and Diane Keaton rules

This is 40 

Watch it: Judd Apatow’s best film don’t @ me

HER

Watch it: as it asks new questions about love in a deeply compelling way

Mustang

Watch it: for a brilliant film on female sexual agency

Paper Heart

Watch it: as an earnest and heartfelt investigation into whether love exists, is possible to achieve, how one finds it and what one does with it

Twilight, the series

Watch it: Because we just had to

In The Mood For Love

Watch it: Big big Mood. No puns.

Blue Valentine

Watch it: Heart-wrenching, but worth it (plus… Gosling)

Crazy Stupid Love

Watch it: a Modern classic (+ we repeat… Gosling)

The Big Sick

Watch it: for modern day (and true story) romance that we can all relate to

About Time

Watch it: and if you’re not weeping at some point you’re not doing it right